27 Best (And 5 WTF) New Android Games From The Last 2 Weeks (6/24/14 – 7/7/14)

Welcome to the roundup of the best new Android applications, games, and live wallpapers that went live in the Play Store or were spotted by us in the previous 2 weeks or so.

Featured App

GPS Navigation & Maps by Sygic

Today’s roundup is brought to you by Sygic’s premium GPS Navigation & Maps app. If you find Google Maps somewhat lacking, or need a solution for navigating that doesn’t rely on an active data connection, you owe it to yourself to check out Sygic. The main app is completely free to use, and features downloadable, updating offline maps from TomTom. But to really get the most out of Sygic, upgrade to Premium Lifetime Navigation for turn-by-turn voice guidance, lane guides, speed limit info and speed trap alerts, an awesome Heads-Up Display mode that uses your car’s windshield as a transparent display, and more. Right now the upgrade to Premium maps for North America is 40% off ($33.99, normally $55.99) and so is the World maps upgrade (now $69.99, normally $125.99). You can buy both of them in Sygic’s e-shop.

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GPS Navigation & Maps by Sygic is The World’s Most Installed Offline GPS Navigation App powered by TomTom Maps. With GPS Navigation & Maps by Sygic you can enjoy FOREVER FREE: offline TomTom maps, POIs, route planning & free map updates. High quality maps from TomTom and other providers are stored on your Android phone, tablet or SD card for use without internet connection. To get the most of the app upgrade to premium and enjoy lifetime: 3D maps, turn-by-turn voice-guided navigation, lane guidance, speed limit warnings & junction view with lane indicator arrows at complex intersections. Enjoy FOREVER FREE: GPS, offline TomTom maps, POIs, route planning & free map updates, or upgrade to Premium Lifetime Navigation.

Games

99 Bricks Wizard Academy

Android Police coverage: [New Game] 99 Bricks Wizard Academy Is Tetris In Reverse, With Physics, And Leprechauns, And Also Wizards

Flip Tetris on its head and throw in some physics, and you’d get something like 99 Bricks. The original Flash game had you building the tallest tower possible with just 99 Tetris bricks, with only pesky gravity and timing getting in your way. The mobile re-release adds magic spells and jealous wizards to help and hinder you, and removes the artificial limitation. It’s wickedly addicting for anyone looking for a fresh take on an old formula.

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99 Bricks Wizard Academy is a fun and magical physics builder. Can you build the highest tower? Explore a magical world and learn powerful spells to improve your building skills. Do you have what it takes to become the wizard of legends? Defy gravity with intuitive one-touch controls and enjoy endless physics tower building. Meet Big Barry, Harry Hawk and all the others. They’re a jealous bunch who’ll try to mess up your creations, but that won’t stop you.

The World Ends With You

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Square Enix’s DS Port The World Ends With You Is An Expensive Fantasy RPG That’s Truly Final

Square Enix’s The World Ends With You was one of the most original RPGs on the Nintendo DS, and that’s saying something for a company that has released about seventy Final Fantasy games. This apocalyptic urban fantasy is infused with anime hip-hop style, but the battle system with computer-controlled allies and massive screen-filling special attacks is what fans really enjoy. It’s too bad Square still hasn’t figured out that most people don’t want to spend $20 on a re-release (with IAP no less!) no matter how good the original was.

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Square Enix’s fresh-faced hit The New York Times called “one of the best role playing games ever designed for anything” has busted onto Android in a big way, with a slick and addictive new combat system, eye-popping HD art, and (of course) plenty of zetta awesome reasons for longtime fans to double dip.Arm yourself with psychic superpowers and battle your way through a seven-day gauntlet of action: the Reaper’s Game.

The Walking Dead: Season Two

Android Police coverage: [New Game] The Walking Dead: Season Two Lurches Into The Play Store In Search Of Fresh Braaaaaaaaains

Hot on the shambling heels of The Walking Dead: Season One, the next chapter of TellTale’s take on the super-popular zombie comics is now available on the Play Store. Like the original, this is an adventure game, where the focus is on story-advancing decisions and branching paths rather than trigger-happy action. Also like the original, you’ll need decent hardware to run the cell-shaded visuals, and you’ll also need about $15 to get all five episodes via in-app purchase.

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The Walking Dead: Season Two is a five-part (Episodes 2 and 3 can be purchased in-app, Episodes 4 and 5 will be available to purchase and download later this Summer) game series that continues the story of Clementine, a young girl orphaned by the undead apocalypse. Left to fend for herself, she has been forced to learn how to survive in a world gone mad. Many months have passed since the events seen in Season One of The Walking Dead, and Clementine is searching for safety.

The Wolf Among Us

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Telltale Games’ The Wolf Among Us Comes To Android, But Amazon-Only For Now

If you’re a fan of Telltale’s Walking Dead games, you should try their other adventure-horror franchise. This adaptation of the Fables series of comic books follows a wolf (not a werewolf, a “Big Bad” wolf, as in Riding Hood) as he tries to solve a series of gruesome murders perpetrated on fairy tale icons. It’s like Shrek, with lots of killing and smoking. Unfortunately, it’s only available for Kindle Fire tablets at the moment – it should come to the Play Store for the rest of us at some point.

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The Wolf Among Us is a five-part (Episodes 2-5 can be purchased in-app, as they become available) from the creators of The Walking Dead, winner of over 90 Game of the Year awards. Fairytale characters are being murdered in this hard-boiled, violent and mature thriller based on the award-winning Fables comic book series (DC Comics/Vertigo) by Bill Willingham. As Bigby Wolf – THE big bad wolf – you will discover that a brutal, bloody murder is just a taste of things to come in a game series where your every decision can have enormous consequences.

  

  

Amazon – The Wolf Among Us

Lost Toys

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Award Winning 3D Puzzler Lost Toys Comes To Android With Style To Spare

If some insane man with a jigsaw decided to turn children’s wooden toys into Rubik’s cubes because he just hated joy, then someone else decided to kindly undo his handiwork, you’d have something like Lost Toys. It’s your job to twist, turn, and re-arrange a series of mobiles into their intended shapes, all while trying not to gawk at the drop-dead gorgeous visuals or cry at the oh-so-atmospheric music. Lost Toys is three dollars for 32 levels with no in-app purchases.

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Lost Toys is a mentally engaging 3D puzzle game of profound beauty, depth and challenge. Toys are lost, broken, or forgotten. Fixing them promises to right this hauntingly gorgeous chamber and restore the childhood innocence that has been lost. It’s also the first game from the two-person indie team Barking Mouse Studio. Spiral down to discover a surreal world populated by discarded, mixed-up toys hanging lifelessly from the ceiling. Reconstruct the jumbled toys to reveal their original shapes to progress through 4 chapters and 32 levels in this gothic masterpiece.

INDY 500 Arcade Racing

Android Police coverage: [New Game] HyperDevBox Releases Officially Licensed INDY 500 Arcade Racing [Update]

It’s been over a year and a half since ExZues developer HyperDevBox released a new game, but last week they came out of nowhere and surprised us with an officially-licensed racing title. This game lets you zip around the famous Indianapolis racetrack in blisteringly fast open-wheeled cars, either in a standard single-player campaign or via a local Bluetooth multiplayer connection. The graphics are impressive and simulation-like, but the gameplay is a little floaty, more like an arcade racer.

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Feeling the Nostalgia of playing Real Arcade Racing games ? Don’t look further… INDY 500® Arcade Racing does bring back the fun of the retro Arcade atmosphere whilst using today’s latest technology. In cooperation with Indianapolis Motor Speedway, We are proud to introduce (exclusive for Android worldwide), the official INDY 500® track and 33 meticulously-detailed open-wheel INDY cars.Moving at speeds well over 200mph, INDY 500® Arcade Racing features jaw-dropping 3D graphics and an adrenaline-pumping driving experience.

Wave Wave

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Wave Wave From Noodlecake Is A Twitch Game That Will Do Its Very Best To Melt Your Brain

Oh God, I hate this game. I hate it so much. The basic principle is easy: tap or release the screen to move a line up or down, keeping it between two walls in a hallway. But the thumping music, trippy visuals, and ever-shifting perspective will do their best to completely destroy both your patience and your sanity. It’s like Flappy Bird and Super Hexagon had a demon child. If you manage to last a whole three seconds in your first practice run, you’ll be doing well.

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Brought to Android by Noodlecake Studios, Wave Wave is a savage arcade game developed by Thomas Janson, with music by Danimal Cannon and Zef. Shift up and down to avoid the gauntlet of triangles. Hectic. Extreme. Addictive. Racing. Tumultuous. Blitzing. Electric. Anaerobic. Treacherous. Fearless game play. Fall into ‘the zone’ where your brain switches off. Overcome mind-to-finger-to-screen latency. An incredible 8 track album, ‘Parallel Processing’.

 

THE RHYTHM OF FIGHTERS

Android Police coverage: [New Game] SNK Wants You To Dance To The Beat-Down In Rhythm Of Fighters

SNK’s 2D fighting games are legendary for their twitchy action, skillful combos, and relentless two-player competition. So the best way to boil that experience down for mobile is… by making a timing-based rhythm game? Surprisingly, The Rhythm of Fighters works really well: as you tap and slide in time to the authentic 16-bit music, your fighter punches, kicks, and performs special moves. I only wish it had multiplayer, and also that it didn’t have the usual leveling system or IAPs for bonus character unlocks.

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Unleash your favorite special moves and combos following the frenzied rhythm. Play to the rhythm of the music to make your character unleash fan-favorite moves and combos on the opponent. Take advantage of the “Rhythm Battle System” for astronomical scores. Let’s enjoy the ultimate blend of rhythm & fighting game genres for a unique game. With its user-friendly controls that allow you to tap anywhere on the game screen, “THE RHYTHM OF FIGHTERS” can be played and enjoyed by everyone.

Spy vs Spy

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Chillingo Releases Spy Vs Spy, A Modern Remake Of The Atari Classic With Retro Mode Included

It’s been thirty years since the Spy vs Spy game (based on the Mad Magazine comic strip) came out, and those with fond memories of the original will be happy to se this re-release. It features the same basic hide-and-seek gameplay that you remember, complete with both a two-player mode and a skinned version featuring the original graphics. But since Chillingo is an EA subsidiary, prepare to deal with advertising, currency-based IAP (for level unlocks and single-player cheats only), and a separate international listing.

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SPY vs SPY is based on the original, multi-million unit selling, break out hit by First Star Software, Inc. It features Wi-Fi multiplayer matches, a pixel perfect retro mode as well as a modern mode, both with the famous black and white spies from MAD Magazine. Choose joystick or other touch controls.

• Wi-Fi multiplayer support – sabotage and intrigue included
• 16 brand new embassies –for a total of 24 plus 24 additional embassies as an in-app-purchase
• Play alone in custom matches in up to 48 embassies, each with 5 levels of difficulty –- you select the IQ of the opposing spy
• Up to 8 types of Booby-Traps – play as the famous black and white spies from MAD Magazine
• Purchase a second set of traps; or, 2 sets of cheats: Insta-Kill to immediately vanquish the enemy spy in single-player mode; and, Reveal-O-Matic to display the embassy map showing the location of all inventory items & stars.
• Includes the original theme music plus 4 new remixes

 

Monsters Ate My Birthday Cake

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Cartoon Network’s Monsters Ate My Birthday Cake Arrives In The Play Store

Cartoon Network games are usually based on an existing cartoon property, but Monsters Ate My Birthday Cake is a (mostly) original title. You play one of several monsters navigating an island via top-down mazes, using your various powers (including farts and rainbow vomit) to defeat enemies and solve puzzles. Surprisingly, this is a straight-up premium game: five bucks gets you in and there are no in-app purchases. Good on ya, Cartoon Network.

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Warning: This game is crammed full of monsters, cake, amazing powers, puzzly bits, epic adventure, witty repartee, secret paths, unlockable characters, silly hats and a wiener dog. Use caution if you are allergic to fun or overly sensitive to cake-related pathos. As so many of these things do, it all begins on a magical island. In this case, Gogapoe Island, a place populated by both humans and monsters. What starts out as a mission to get back Niko’s birthday cake becomes a quest for the fate of Gogapoe itself. But, ya know, cake is still super important, too.

SoulCraft 2 – Action RPG

Android Police coverage: [New Game] SoulCraft 2 Is An Action RPG With Wings

The original SoulCraft was a Diablo-style top-down RPG that pushed the boundaries of Android graphics at the time of its release. The sequel doesn’t look quite so fantastic two and a half years later, but it does have the same hack, slash, zap gameplay that fans of the genre expect. It’s also got an asynchronous multiplayer mode that lets you attack other player’s bases, and support for external controllers. Heads up for those in-app purchases – they’re a devil in multiplayer games.

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SoulCraft 2 – League of Angels is the best Action RPG for Android. Choose one of seven Angels and defend earth from the legions of hell. Compete multiplayer against other players in the social league and become the best SoulCraft player in the world.

• New Multiplayer League: Challenge other players in asynchronous multiplayer matches and customize your defenses. Win your daily leagues to become the best SoulCraft Player in the world
• 7 different heroes: Choose your play style from melee warriors to range mages
• Epic singleplayer campaign: continue your quest to save the world from the demons of the apocalypse
• Full controller support (incl. MOGA) – play it on your big TV screen

Bezircle

This is the part of the roundup where I usually compare a game to other games, sometimes employing two or three at a time, to give you a rough idea of the gameplay. But Bezircle’s rotary mechanic isn’t quite like anything I’ve seen before – check the video to see how it works. The game includes a standard single-player campaign filled with expanding stages and power-ups, and a 4-player mode that uses a single device for party-style fun.

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Dive into fun-packed tactical battles. Capture valuable orbs and powerful boosters using reflex timing, tactical decision-making and one-touch skill to beat your opponents. Amazing single-player depth, infinite multiplayer mayhem, and mind-bending complexity with loads of variations for puzzle and strategy fans of any age. There are no in-app purchases in Bezircle, you get the full game right away.

Eliss Infinity

The original Eliss, a popular combination of puzzle and twitch mechanics, never made it off of iOS to run free in the green fields of Android. With the sequel, Eliss Infinity, the developer is correcting that oversight. You manage a series of “planets” spawning into space, placing them into black holes and clearing the board. You can combine planets of the same color to make them bigger, or break them apart to fit into the gravity wells, but letting different-color planets touch for too long is a recipe for galactic disaster.

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The “Most Innovative Game” award-winning multitouch puzzler is back. Use your fingers to control all the planets, fuse planets together until they become giant, or split them into halves until they become tiny, you’re in charge of this reactive universe. Just don’t let different colors touch. Eliss is an award winning and critically praised game, with innovative multitouch gameplay, a stylish and fluid procedural design, dynamic sounds, and a superb soundtrack. It’s a fast-paced puzzle/action game that will push your limits as a player.

Bounden

Bounden teaches you how to perform ballet. Well, sort of – the various twists and poses you’ll hold in the game, with the direction of one half of the screen for you and the other half for your partner, are only “ballet” in the same sense that the clicks and taps of Guitar Hero are “music.” But you’ve got to give the developers credit for making a unique game that instructs physical movement, kind of like a two-person Twister with perpetual motion. And in case you’re wondering, yes, it has exactly the same party game potential. Don’t play it unless you’re very comfortable with the other player (or you’d like to be).

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A mobile dancing game for two, featuring dances by the Dutch National Ballet. Bounden is a mix of Twister and ballet. You use your phone as a guide to dance, or get entangled with someone else. So, you pull out your phone, ask another person to put down a thumb, and move synchronously to dance together. Play at a bar, during a date, during work hours, or as a performance, even with other couples playing at the same time.

Super Pixelander

This game is basically a perfect mix of Lunar Lander and Space Invaders. If you’re too young for that to make sense, try this instead: you control a spaceship that’s constantly being dragged down by gravity. A single tap will fire both your rockets and your gun, forcing you to exercise near-perfect timing to hit the asteroids below you (to collect the pieces) and avoid the ones above (so you don’t become pieces). Super Pixelander is free with no in-app purchases.

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TLDR: DODGE COLLECT and REPEAT. An addictive twist to the classic lunar lander formula, pilot your lander to fame and riches by collecting precious space gems (because gems in space are obviously more precious) while surviving the dangerous asteroid belt filled with alien attacks and molten lava.

– hyper addictive “one more try” style game
– dodge and shoot. fight back with your awesome blaster engine that shoots..uh blasters?
– easy to control but the game is anything but easy.
– tons of weapons and hats to unlock, because things
– the best things in life are free, and free this game is

Heroes and Castles

Heroes And Castles is an ambitious title that combines a full 3D fantasy hack-and-slash affair with strategy and tower defense. You’ll have to juggle fighting on the ground, commanding and healing your units and yourself, with keeping up your castle’s defense and offense against a horde of slobbering monsters. It’s an impressive mix of genres with surprising polish, and the developer says that a multiplayer mode is coming soon.

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The Undead Horde and their Orc and Goblin allies are at your castle gates, the King is on the brink of death, and only you stand between the enemy and complete annihilation. Choose one of many powerful heroes, summon an army to fight beside you, and defend your castle in Heroes & Castles, a seamless blend of 3rd person Action-RPG, Strategy, and Castle Defense elements.

Nexionode

Do you ever wonder what Geordi is actually doing while he’s re-coupling the ODN power relays? It probably looks something like this. In Nexionode you re-connect the power to a spaceship using nothing but magical lasers. You’ll have to find the perfect sequence to get all those nodes activated without missing a connection, which won’t be easy… especially when they start moving around. The app is $5, but here’s a demo version if you just want to check it out.

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Nexionode is a Sci-Fi logic puzzler set deep in outerspace. While the human crew is under cryostasis, the Nexio Colony Spaceship is suffering massive failures. You are TL-9507, a unique RepairDrone: your AI has been secretly enhanced. Woken up by a security alert, only you can repair the ship’s circuits. Use your logic skills to save the Colony from imminent destruction. We didn’t make the puzzles easy: Nexionode is deviously crafted for those of us who enjoy overheating our brain.

Blek

Blek is all about pattern recognition. The point is to draw a line that will continue after a set period, mimicking your original path. Get it just right and it will collect all the dots, which is much harder than it sounds at first. It’s easy enough to understand once you get started, but advancing past the later levels will require planning and strategy. The graphics couldn’t be simpler, but there’s an odd catharsis in seeing your line copy itself across the screen.

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Blek is a unique game about imagination and personality. Everything you draw keeps moving – and watching your creations move is like watching magic. The goal is simple: shape a line that collects all colored circles avoiding black holes on its route. There are no specific moves that you need to master. To every level countless solutions exist, from delightfully simple to exceptionally deep and complex, yet always elegant.

Unlock – The Game

Come on, developer. “Inspired by Android lockscreens,” my eye. This game is intended to train an army of data thieves with perfect pattern recall, isn’t it? You devious mastermind.

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“Unlock – The Game” is a free game inspired by android lockscreens. Compete with your friends and see who is the best at unlocking android phones.

• Simple, yet addictive gameplay
• Multiple game modes
• Clean, minimalistic graphics
• Progressive upgrade system
• Global Leaderboards

Star Nomad: RPG RTS Sandbox

Star Nomad is an PRG at its core, but the exploration and combat are a mix of the old pirate math PC games and Asteroids, respectively. Fly your 2D ship around a surprisingly large galaxy, selling legitimate wares, smuggling ill-gotten gains, or grabbing the odd bounty or two. On the way you’ll uncover the open-ended story, not to mention upgrade your ship or buy new ones. The free game has two in-app purchases, one for a souped-up ship and one for a permanent credit bonus, either of which will remove the advertising.

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Star Nomad is a top-down Role Playing Strategy Sandbox. It was created as a tribute to classic sandbox spacesims of old such as Wing Commander: Privateer 1 & 2, Escape Velocity and Freelancer. Roam free in a universe rich in story and humor. Be a mercenary for hire, merchant trader, contraband smuggler evading the law or even a pirate making your fortune and fame (infamy) in the Wildlands Sector. Effortlessly fly your ship with an intuitive one-touch UI.

Disney Bola Soccer

The nice thing about having both a kid’s television channel and the world’s biggest sports network in your corporate empire is that you can start the tykes on that ESPN branding early. That’s what Disney is trying to do with Bola Soccer, which is conveniently timed with that big to do down in Brazil. It’s a competent little soccer game with basic controls, but make sure you’ve got in-app purchases for the dual currency system disabled if you install it on your kid’s tablet.

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Do you have what it takes to WIN? Play solo or against your friends in this ultimate soccer adrenaline rush and prove that you’re the champ. LEAD YOUR DREAM TEAM from the slum to win the global championship. CHALLENGE YOUR FRIENDS and rivals from every country. IMPROVE PLAYER PERFORMANCE with different skills – defense, speed, ability, intelligence and attack to become a true Bola Champ.

  

Jupiter Jump

This charming little endless runner stars a spaceman jumping on Jupiter. Well, the title is Jupiter Jump – I assume that he is in fact jumping on one of the planet’s many moons, since Jupiter has no solid surface, and if it did, jumping on it would cause you to break both your femurs at once. It’s a standard endless runner with reverse-jumps initiated with a tap, plus some allegedly old-school pixel graphics and chiptune music sprinkled on top.

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Dash and dodge mines in this action packed game from Noodlecake Games. Jupiter Jump is an action-arcade game, where you tap the screen to maneuver your astronaut through mines, portals, and gates. Easy to pick up and play, and looks greats on tablets.

Up Up Rocket

Up Up Rocket is basically a linear version of Simon Says. The little cartoon rocket’s window changes color a bit faster than once a second, and you have to tap the corresponding color to fire its jets and reach ever higher. Tap the wrong color and you explode – no pressure. When multiple rockets appear on screen, you’ll have to start tapping the correct colors in sequence. Lovers of Flappy Bird-style frustration games will be hooked on this one.

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Up Up Rocket is an extremely Fun, Addictive and Challenging Arcade game. Please do not install this game, unless you are able to handle such an extremely fun game. Start off by controlling one rocket, then two, and then finally three. Can you handle it?! Game Play:

• Move the rocket up by tapping the color that is shown in the rockets window.
• Avoid hitting the wrong color.
• Be ready to handle more than one rocket
• Try to get to the very top.

Uppercup Football (Soccer)

Attention Americans: in many places around the world, dumb, backwards places that aren’t America, the sad and somewhat boring sport that we call Soccer is erroneously referred to as “Football.” We in Freedomland know that football consists of gigantic man-beasts in plastic armor smashing into one another for eight seconds at a time, and we can only hope that the rest of the world will catch up sooner or later. To save confusion, the developers of Uppercup Football made sure to put the correct name (Soccer) in the title as well, just in case you downloaded it and expected a real sport. That is all. Thank you for your time, and GOD BLESS ‘MERICA.

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Tap, kick and score your way into soccer history in this free one-touch soccer game from Motion Twin. Win cups, lots of cups, and beat your opponents into the mud. UpperCup Football is a frenetic one-touch soccer game that doesn’t even always have a soccer ball. Take control of one team and pitch them against the best soccer talent the world has to offer – you and eleven tiny men will travel from the snow-capped Andes to the Moscow Kremlin and beyond as you kick, kick and, uh, kick harder towards the dream of being crowned champions of Brazil 2014.

Globber’s Escape

There have been quite a few Pac-Man clones over the decades. This one isn’t really any different, but it’s pretty, and the characters have a little more personality than Namco’s yellow pizza man. Whether that’s enough to get over the typical currency-based IAP system, a pointer-style control scheme, and the usual focus on coins and quasi-social interaction, well, that’s for you to decide. At least it won’t cost you anything to try it out.

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The International Coalition of Evil (ICE) thinks Globber may just be the key to global domination. Globber is a gelatinous pink mass with the potential for mass destruction… but he wants no part in the Mad Scientists’ plan to take over the world. Furious, ICE imprisons Globber in the heart of their secret laboratory. It’s up to you to help Globber escape.In this touchscreen-oriented rejuvenation of classic Pac Man style gameplay, you control Globber as he bolts through through the chambers of a secret laboratory.

HERCULES: THE OFFICIAL GAME

Another summer blockbuster, another glitzy licensed mobile game. This one claims to be based on the seven trials of Hercules, but you know the drill: it’s a bog-standard hack, slash, dodge fighter in the tradition of Infinity Blade. And since this one comes from Glu, you can bet there’s a huge amount of grind in store if you want to get the best equipment or beat the hardest bosses without spending any real money. At least it looks nice.

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Become Hercules, the greatest hero of Greece in the official game from the movie. Embark upon 12 epic labors, spite the Goddess Hera, seek redemption for your sins, and prove your worth to all of Greece as Hercules. Swipe your way through the bloodiest ancient battles in the most exciting hack-and-slash game in the Google Play store. Defeat your enemies faster with special combinations of melee, magic and ranged traits to cause maximum damage. Revel in your brutal victory after slashing through rivals with devastating finishing moves.

Pyramid Solitaire Saga

This is King Games’ latest mobile title. It’s included on this list (in the full knowledge that it in no way qualifies as the “Best” of anything) only so that you’ll know what your mom is playing on her iPhone, and also that you should avoid it at all costs. It looks like some cross between an Indiana Jones knock-off and a creative interpretation of Solitaire. It’s free with in-app purchases. Please don’t play it, and don’t line the pockets of this horrible company.

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Pyramid Solitaire Saga, from the makers of Candy Crush Saga & Farm Heroes Saga. Challenge awaits you in this magical Solitaire game. Join Helena and her loyal companion Kingsley on their journey to reveal the wonders of the Ancient World. Find the clues by catching the Scarabs hidden beneath the Cards. You can match a Card that is one greater or lower than the one on your deck.

WTF Game(s) Of The Week

Denny’s Atari® Remix

Android Police coverage: [New Game] Denny’s Atari Remix Is The Weirdest Discount Restaurant / Arcade Game Crossover You’ll See Today

Denny’s wants you to know about its wide selection of all-night dining options, and apparently the best way to go about that is…. by re-skinning old Atari games. Americana diner versions of Asteroids, Centipede, and Breakout are the crowning glory of this game, and aside from the fact that Hashteroids has you piloting a ketchup bottle, Centipup has you shooting syrup, and Take-Out has you bouncing an egg around the screen, they’re surprisingly authentic. It’s still weird as Hell.

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We’ve been wondering… There are video games. There are also diners. So where are all the diner-themed video games? Luckily, Denny’s has partnered with Atari® to fill that gap in the gaming world. Introducing, Denny’s Atari® Remix app. Take a nostalgic trip into the past with three classic Atari® games infused with breakfasty goodness for a new spin on old favorites. Destroy hashteroids, fight off the centipup and break down walls made solely out of breakfast foods. But these great games are only available for a limited time, so download today and get’em while they’re hot.

KIM KARDASHIAN: HOLLYWOOD

Hey, girls! You know that becoming successful and happy via intelligence and hard work is for suckers, right? If you’re pretty enough, you can be famous just for being famous, marry an over-inflated rap star, and live the American dream one cosmetic surgery at a time! But if you’re not, you can pretend you are with KIM KARDASHIAN: HOLLYWOOD, Glu’s RPG war crime committed against restraint and good taste. Don’t forget the in-app purchases so you can recharge your bobble-headed airhead’s energy meter.

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Join KIM KARDASHIAN on a red carpet adventure in Kim Kardashian: Hollywood. Create your own aspiring celebrity and rise to fame and fortune.

⋆ CREATE YOUR OWN STAR and customize your look with hundreds of style options, including Kim Kardashian’s personal picks.
⋆ STAR in a huge interactive adventure as you encounter other celebs, dedicated fans, persistent paparazzi… and even hang out with Kim herself.
⋆ RULE THE RED CARPET as an A-list movie actor, cover model, fashion designer and more – what you do is up to you.
⋆ TAKE OVER L.A. in a virtual world complete with exclusive clubs, upscale boutiques, and luxury homes. Travel to New York City and Miami.
⋆ DATE AND DUMP CELEBS at the best parties and hottest clubs. Flirt and become the next huge celebrity power-couple.

The Ministry of Silly Walks

Gamers, I’m afraid the Ministry of Silly Walks is no longer getting the kind of support it needs from the British government. You see there’s the Ministry of Defense, the Ministry of Social Security, Health, Housing, Education, Silly Walks … they’re all supposed to get the same. But last year, the Government spent less on the Ministry of Silly Walks than it did on National Defense! It’s gotten so ridiculous that our Minister Mr. Cleese has taken to walking the streets, searching for loose change, all while keeping up the fine traditions of the Ministry and trying to avoid pigeons, crates, and improbably hanging girders. If you assist him, you may keep a small amount of the coins you find for your wardrobe stipend and various helpful items. You will never have to spend any of your own money – after all, you’ve already paid your taxes. Now get out there, Junior Minister Second Class, and do us proud.

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Unleash your silly walk across London dodging dangerous obstacles and collecting gold coins in this stupendously addictive survival game. Monty Python invites you to join that British bastion of eccentric loco-motion – The Ministry of Silly Walks. Your assignment as a member of this venerable organization is to showcase your increasingly frantic promenading as far as you possibly can. As you and your stiff upper lip travel through the streets of London take care to avoid obstacles and pesky pigeons.

 

Let it Goat

What is it with goats and self-aware “funny” games lately? When did goats become the new pirates and/or ninjas? Man, you really fall behind on this stupid crap after you graduate college. This is a basic endless runner that combines screaming goats and Disney’s Frozen, and also zombies for some reason, included here more for oddity than actual recommendation. And no, there’s nothing you can do that will get me to sing that princess song, so don’t even try.

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Jack & Jack presents LET IT GOAT, a simple fun game about a cute goat named Mounty. LET IT GOAT. LET IT GOAT. Can’t hold him back anymore. JUST TAP TO JUMP over the Spikes & Zombies. Collect Gems to get Bear Power Ups to run farther than your friends. Can you make it past 5 spikes? Experience the #1 Goat game with real Goat Music and Goat Voices. New updates coming soon.

Spermania

I can’t decide whether Spermania is a genuine attempt to create a reproduction-themed 2D racer, or a game developer dad’s way of giving “the talk” to his kids. You play as a sperm racing to outrun your X and Y siblings through a cartoony vagina, avoiding traps like white blood cells and pools of acid. (What?) The game of life is kind of like the Game of Thrones: you only get to live (in a very literal sense of the word) if you win.

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Spermania is a game unlike any other. It’s based on what happens in the only race in our life that really matters. This is the story of one brave little sperm’s quest to create life – an epic voyage full of challenges and setbacks. In this pack, you will navigate the vagina and battle the forces of the immune system – angry viruses, sneaky white blood cells and sizzling acid pools. Yes, Spermania is (more or less) true to life – but you still probably won’t show it to your kids.

Know A Worthy New App? Let Us Know!

If you have an application in mind for the next issue of the roundup, feel free to send us an email and let us know.

Important: there are 2 requirements in order for the app to be considered, listed below.

• the app’s launch date has to be no longer than 2 weeks ago
• it has to be original, ground-breaking, well-reviewed, interesting, fun, etc – the cream of the crop

Now, if and only if the above requirements have been satisfied, fire up an email to this address: [email protected].

1 sponsored placement per week is available (your app would be featured at the top and marked as sponsored) – please contact us for details.